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PostPosted: Sun Jul 27, 2003 1:22 am  Post subject: monkeysmasher love a.ka. 'it burns when i pee'
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The Devil, Probably
Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2002 3:07 am
Posts: 2174
Location: I'm inside of you.
* Because monkeysmasher deleted all his previous posts from this thread, making following replys kinda pointless, I split/cleaned this thread :) * - Iconoclast


hehe, no problem iconoclastmeister. i think i deleted them to clean up a bit. my yahoo site deleted my stuff.


Last edited by monkeysmasher on Mon Oct 05, 2009 12:46 am, edited 28 times in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2003 7:13 am  Post subject:
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The Ancient One
Joined: Sun Feb 23, 2003 10:03 am
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Location: Norway - Where the polar bears roam the streets
Hobbs End? Wasn't that the place in 'In the Mouth of Madness'?


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2003 7:18 am  Post subject:
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Sure was :)

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2003 6:34 pm  Post subject:
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yeah, thats what drew me to the title, the cover has someone hand holding a chainsaw walking towards a house. i didnt really watch it, and what i did see of it kind sucked, in a psychological thriller sort of way, and i accidently had gnot set for half cd(ididnt know it did that) so its only 350mb, still looks good, but id call it an economy download.

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'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2003 12:23 pm  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
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And the cyborg Wargand is almost done. This is the pre-release, it was the release untill i saw how messed up it looks on this computer monitor, compared to my tv. It needs quite a few 'touch ups'.

its the top one, i didnt put a little nametag like on tak.

the link that probably wont direct link the picture(tell me if you can get to the pic from this link)-
http://www.geocities.com/monkeysmasher2 ... hawarg.jpg

if not, here is the page-
http://www.geocities.com/monkeysmasher2 ... ilers.html

im in a bit of a mecha mood, so my picture of ohgodnotanotherone isnt a clown, but of what a computer would look like if i had my way.

johndoe, hetero vampire is comming up next too.
and my story bout steps is comming along swimingly, it has pictures!

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2003 3:53 pm  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
Joined: Mon Jun 09, 2003 1:04 pm
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Location: In the darkest spot of your soul.
monkeysmasher wrote:
And the cyborg Wargand is almost done. This is the pre-release, it was the release untill i saw how messed up it looks on this computer monitor, compared to my tv. It needs quite a few 'touch ups'.


Oh damn, how the F**** did you come near of a photo of me? I am sure it was when I posted my hash here. Now I have to create another identity for me. :evil: :evil:


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2003 4:20 pm  Post subject:
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The Ancient One
Joined: Mon Mar 31, 2003 3:28 pm
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Location: Somewhere between dimensions, waiting.
Love the mask on my head mate, and when I say boiler suit I just mean sorta liek Jason type stuff in the Friday the 13th movies, that sorta thing, keep em coming bud cos you is good at this malarkey. Like I said, I am fucked if someone asks me to draw a stick man :wink: argh, not the wink, I meant :matrix:

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2003 2:36 am  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
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hehe,
i wrote a story about accountants while trying to draw a picture of a wicked naked nun. I am easily distracted.

http://www.geocities.com/monkeysmasher2 ... audit.html

hmmm, why does it have two '//' darkaudit.html ?
weird.

hehe, and i started another guide. well, its more of an autobiography, called 'How to never get laid(ever!), the monkeysmasher way!'
true story, today's excerpt-

while doing whatever it is i do all day, this lady i pass by often decided to speak to me, the conversation went slightly like this:

her:'how come you never talk to me? your so bashfull!"

and my reply
(yes, again, guess wich one.It's multiple choice!)
1. 'I get tongue tied around beautiful women, and say stupid things....well, kind of like what i'm doing now. Sorry, i'll just step back with what little dignity i have and try making a better impression next time, before i start blushing."

2. 'I'm not bashfull, your fucking ugly.'



my court day is next thursday. Its embarrasing getting my ass kicked by a girl, but really i'm starting to get used to it.

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2003 4:57 am  Post subject:
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Joined: Sat Nov 02, 2002 1:35 am
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So do you work in graphics or is it just for hobby?

Your piccies looks pretty damn good, of course they are no work of Spudcasso :alien:

Image

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2003 5:28 am  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2002 3:07 am
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Location: I'm inside of you.
most graphic work i do are tattoos. on people. its gross, and its been awile since i did any for serious $.
i wouldnt mind a job as some sort of computer graphic artist. ive done some artwork for a few websites and some projects already, now im just messing around doing stuff for free, i guess. ive been trying to finish some of my own projects, but i am easily distracted, and everytime i finish something then look at it, i usually end up wanting to re-do it because i think it looks bad or a word/detail is out of place, and being a single mother working as a topless exotic dancer is hard to find time for it all.

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2003 5:34 am  Post subject:
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Wat programs do you use?

I'm meaning to make a new banner/logo for the site without the horror images on, but I'd like to know if you got any tips on making decent logos.

:)

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2003 6:46 am  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
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eh,
i use photoshop for the above. Ive just started with photoshop recently.
i draw the picture then use my video camera to scan it in.(because i can never figure out how my scanner works.) then i 'ink' it with black on the pencil lines and shadows, then color in the rest. I have a lot of free time. It would take longer, but im usually pretty drunk.

ive seen all kinds of logo making programs floating around. never used them. i did make some logos in bryce using text made in photoshop, for that 3-d effect. i also like that 'liquid' filter for virtualdub. makes it look neat-o.

eh, u said youve messed with poser before, i think. they are all kind of similar- the 3d progs.

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2003 7:26 am  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
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eh, maybe you should make a 'create a logo' contest? i see them on other websites, like 'create the HHAH logo or i kill this rabbit!'
then kill the rabbit anyway.

and on a movie related note-
each time i see a movie so bad that a small part of me dies, well today i watched 2 of them in a row-

Forever Evil
Slaughter High

(and 'revenge of the zombies' was no picnic.)

almost as bad as 'demonkeeper'(man that sucked).
I swear some movies i watch are so bad that they practicaly dare you to watch them.its not ashamed at its stupidity, it actually flaunts it with each 'we'll be safer if we split up', like some kind of 'force of will' battle between me and the movie. It tries to be so damn bad, while i try to remain as lazy as possible and not turn it off, hopeing it will become good. Who was the winner? not me, thats for damn sure.

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2003 8:43 am  Post subject:
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I think I win, I just round to watching some X-files and some of the episodes have corrupted!!! :evil: :evil: :evil:

*sigh*

Looks like I'll have to download them again

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 31, 2003 8:05 am  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
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Location: I'm inside of you.
Did a bunch of The Simpson's pictures. I did principle skinner as norman bates. i dont think they did that on the simpson's yet. I did a picture of bart on a shooting spree in school, but am wondering if its in poor taste. well, of course it is, but is it in too poor taste? guess i'll have to add slaughtered babies, dead maggie. Yeah, that'd bout do it.
eh, did some animated 'Monkeyvision' logo's. i'll put em all up when i find my password again.man, i gotta quit either writing stuff on my hand, or stop taking showers. some the logos are rather neat(ithink) and if anyone(spud) want;s to know how i did 'em, i happily reveal my mysterious Secrets Of Logomationonomy'.


<hr>
Monkey's guide for Today-
'things not to say to the police(when walking home at 2am drunk)'.

"Hey! you! Your on something punk, Lets see some identification. What the hell are you doing out here at 2am?'

'Why, certainly officer, here's my drivers liscence. I was simply enjoying a walk on this fine summer night, after....

1-'...... having sex with your wife.The only time i could schedule an appointment was while you are at work. Quite a long waiting list, i was penciled in since september.'
2-'.....doing your mother.'
3-'.....all, it's so refreshing to see that this cities police department has such an enlightend and understanding policy on hiring such a flamboyantly homosexual man as yourself, officer.'
4-'.... this crack isnt going to sell itself, buy or shove off, porkchop, or i'll get my fork.'


yeah, i got court again on tuesday.

i still havent watched the final episode of x-files.

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 01, 2003 12:09 pm  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
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http://www.geocities.com/monkeysmasher2 ... ghere.html

picture looked rather poor on this monitor, so ended up cropping it just now. Its around 1/4 the size now, im going to fix it up on my other comp.
yep, its called 'demonpenis'.
why?
because i dont think they wear pants in hell. I was going to make it into 'Spud, Heavey Metal Rocker', and it kind of looks like one them heavy metal cover's from the 80's.
kind of looks like one them gargoyles from ultima 6.

and i put a more recent list of my cap'd/ripped movies up. i didnt count them but its probably close to 2000.

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 02, 2003 6:00 am  Post subject: my Review-o-maticatron
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And another result of too much freetime. I was going to make this into a program that creates reviews randomly, but i lost interest. I did it because of all the rather negative reviews i read on imdb,they all started to sound relatively the same, so i wanted to see how hard it would be to automate it. I was thinking of using something like the scripts used by moviemanager progs to just read the plot and look for keywords, and do it like those mad-lib books.but i lost interest.

------------REVIEW-O-MATICATRON----------------
Want to review a movie, but dont know how?
Havent seen a film, yet still want to voice your opinion?
Impress strangers, amaze your pets with...
The Monkeysmasher
Insta-IMDB review-o-maticatron

People want, no they need</i> to know your opinions, even if you dont really have any, just use mine! I dont use them, i rarely even have any, but the ones i do are usually adaptable to any subject or idea, useing the same techniques i do in real life- a series of phrases combined in almost any order, all equally baffling.

Descriptive words-
Innane
Insipid
incompetent
Idiodic
Inept
Imbicilic

Why no positive words? Nobody wants to read how much you liked a movie, or any actuall details, they want disgruntled rants with no actual information.

and to throw in some variation, some non 'i' starting words-
drivel
tedious
and most import of all, crappy.

Throw in them at any point, as often as possible- they fit in fluidly before or after any word. Remember, spelling is not important, in fact, the more mispelling the better- it shows your high emotional state as an actuall attachment to the movie. Generous amounts of words like 'kewl','sux', replacing all the 'e's with '3's, and using alternating capital/lower case letters is a sure way to sound both 'with it' and 'hip' thats so popular with the kidz these dayz.

A review needs more than just one word, that's a sure sign to people that you didnt actually see the movie, so here are all purpose sentences that can apply to any movie.


1. This movie hates you, and its not afraid to show it.
2. With the balancing of karma, this should take care of that midget i accidently ate.
3. It mugged 90 minutes of my life that i will never get back.
4. it proves there is no God.
5. A thrill-o-minute ride, like taking a leak when you have the clap.
6. This movie is why Daddy drinks.
7. The punishment for stealing this movie is having to watch it.
8. It killed my brother, and now its after me.
9. I smashed it with a hammer, but..... LIQUID METAL!
10. This film actually killed me.
11. This movie has been in direct violation of the Geneva Convention.
12. prior to viewing, i often wondered if there was life on other planets, now i wonder if there is any on Earth.
13. i'd rather rub my nuts with Vapor-rub or juggle porcupines.
14. It's funny, but not 'ha-ha' funny, like when my mom got mauled by a bear, or when i saw a nun gets hit by a bus.
15. Reminds me of a clown cemetary, or a dog with cancer.
16. Has been accused of Crimes Against Humanity.
17. Viewers of this movie have been awarded recompensation by the US Supreme Court class action law suit, with the creation of a new legal term specifically made for this film, 'mental molestation'.
18. Its like a porno movie without any sex.
19. Lets go drink paint thinner to make the experience complete.
20. I'm lieing, i never even saw it.



The last step is responding to any critisism. Take anything contradicting your views even in the slightes way as a personal attack. Use as much profanity as possible, using anything racial or religious your can get from thier name. Then accuse them of being a rascist nazi, trying to suppress your views and force thier views on you. Remember, you are right no matter what and they know it but are just being childish, and if they keep it up they are obviously morally inferior to you.

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 02, 2003 6:41 am  Post subject:
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Dead But Dreaming
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:lol: Holy Crap!

That's the funniest sh*t I have read in awhile good job!









:lol:

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 02, 2003 9:53 am  Post subject:
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The Devil, Probably
Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2002 3:07 am
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hehe

i didnt even think anyone bothered reading these posts. i ask people what they thought about my accountants story or something, and i never hear from them again. Only a restraining order arrives in the mail.

my next is called-
'Theories and Experiments With Faster Than Light Speeds and Hypothetical Obstacles in Non-Linear Time Travel'
aka
'how all my pets got flat'

its going to have pictures, a lot of shady math, and plenty of spelling errors. It doesnt help that i know nothing about physics, but i'll still go for a research grant.

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'You - you monster! Why? Why in God's name do you do these horrible things??!'

'I thought it was obvious, you sillly girl.
I'm a monster. I do monstrous things.'


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 02, 2003 12:33 pm  Post subject:
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The Ancient One
Joined: Sun Feb 23, 2003 10:03 am
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Location: Norway - Where the polar bears roam the streets
hell, I'm your monkey-ramblin fan nr. 1! =)
I read that shortie and was surprised at how good it was written! Really cool mate. Actually reqognized myself quite a bit in the situation you described. =)


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