The Squeeze - not horror, this one and I can be short about it. It has Lee van Cleef which is cool, but that's it. This movie simply didn't interest me. I got it for free with a bunch of horror I bought, so I'm OK with that. If you like crime/heist films, you might wanna check it out.

Daughters of Darkness - aka Lèvres de Sang. for a while I confused this film with the Stuart Gordon flick Daughter of Darkness, but the similarities are zero. This one is a very atmospheric film which plays in Ostend, Belgium. Funny to see actors picking up newspapers in my language. A newlywed couple spends the night in an old hotel whoch is empty, apart from them. Soon however, another couple arrives, two women of which one is the Hungarian countess Bathory. A seduction game ensues, and things get out of hand after a while. The story takes it's time to develop, sometimes I thought that it was too slow, but in other moments I thought it was actually a good thing, to emphasize certain things. Delphine Seyrig dominates this movie as Bathory, she blows everyone away with her acting performance. The ending was bad at first, but then made a nice turn. Recommended, but keep in mind that it can be quite slow at times.

The Land That Time Forgot - the Asylum remake. In the "tradition" of nonsensical monsterfilms like MegaDinoSharkCroc vs GigaSuperAquaOctopus, this flick has it's place. Overloaded with cheap cgi and with a steady team of producers and some castmembers, they keep churning out crappy adventures and I'm dumb enough to keep watching them. This one made me laugh once more. Starting out OK-ish, although a teleportal in the ocean is far from OK-ish of course, it goes wilder and wilder throughout: from distracting a guard with the help of a T-rex, to making an oil refinery from garbage McGyver-style, this flick has it all. Make sure your brain is fried before you go and watch this one, as otherwise this movie will do it for you.

Witchery - aka La Casa 4 aka Witchcraft. Starring Linda Blair and David Hasselhoff, this one drew my attention, so after having bought it 2nd hand, I watched it yesterday. Well, what can I say? Italian director, so tyhe film is kind of typical. There are (really) creepy moments, but they also have this cheesy sauce over it, so it never gets really scary. This is mixed with some genuinely weird cinema (the dream sequence is really nasty and weird), and with Blair and Hasselhoff around, it becomes some sort of a cult flick, I enjoyed watching it, the story isn't that great, but I had a good time. Encoding it as I write this, so I'll release it to you guys this fall.

Linda Blair and David Hasselhoff? Bring on the cheese!

De Johnsons - a Dutch horror. It has some "famous" Dutch actors/actresses in it and actually, it is quite good. I totally didn't know this film, so it was a real surprise for me: both the existence and the quality of it. Of course there are some "typical Dutch" acting flaws (especially Kenneth Herdigein as the professor has a weak performance), but overall the film was pretty interesting, and I had a good time watching it. The story is about seven psychopaths who massacre children in a school. They are locked up in amn asylum, but they have to be moved due to maintenance. In the meantime, a photographer is visiting the site for an assignment, and her daughter is having nightmares about seven kids painting the same symbols over and over again on the wall. The film is quite creepy, and the dream sequences are somewhat scary. There is a subplot involving a professor in rituals, but that is a weak aspect of the film. Intersting enough is the other storyline about the photographer's daughter and her dreams. The ending however, kind of blows it. First, the connection between all subplots is far fetched, and the film seems to be cut short too: the ending is pretty sudden. A bit of a pity, as it started out so well. Mildly recommended, because of the not so good ending I can't recommend it wholeheartedly.

Nothing today! Only Virtua Fighter 5: Final Showdown on PS3.

The Wisdom of Crocodiles - like Daughters of Darkness, this is a stylish vampirefilm, but atmosphere is totally different. Only small bits of vampirism come along, and most of the film is about the conflict the main character (very well played by Jude Law) is having with himself: he dates women and then kills them for their blood, but now he has met a girl he has fallen in love with and he wants to keep her. She is in the dark about his nature for a long time, but at a certain moment they have to confront the situation. There is a nice and sometimes funny subplot about some police officers who are suspecting Law's character of murder, but they can't seem to grasp the proof. Good film, recommended.

Shogun's Sadism - another film from the Tokugawa series. This time there were two stories and they were both gruesome, although the first one was the cruelest for sure. It was less stylish than Shoguns Joy, more straightforward: the script only looked for excuses to show more torture and they succeeded. The climactic scene is the one with the oxen splitting the girl. Nasty stuff.

Frisian Terror - another (very) low budget movie from the Netherlands. This one is in Dutch with hardcoded English subs. Sometimes these subs aren't spot on, but OK, considering the budget and all, it isn't so bad. There are some good looking chicks in it, and the main character plays out an extreme follower of the Sigurd cult quite OK. Sigurd is an acnient Frisian king and his skull is believed to have certain powers, and the foloowers think they have to kill people to make Sigurd return. Well, so they kill peopl and it all becomes pretty gory. That was the best part of the film actually. These guys had fun making this superlow budget flick. Recommended for bad moviefans!

Curse of the Komodo - really stupid monsterflick. I recognised Paul Logan from Mega Piranha, which is a bad sign. Looking up some info on the actresses reveals lots and lots of boobies pictures, also not a very good sign. Then on to the monsters, they are cliche cgi as in your worst dreams about cheap horror. Then throw in a military guy who, surprise, surprise, only thought of his career when putting several people on an island with a secret government project to use the giant komodo dragons as a weapon and there you have it: your super mediocre monsterflick which can only serve as brainless entertainment.

Peeping Tom - one of the first psycho killer films ever made. It is very slow, so you really have to sit down for this one. A guy named Mark Lewis works with filmcrews by day and murders girls at night, because he is much interested in filming their fear. In his home, where he is the landlord, he meets one of his tenants, a young girl who lives on the first floor. She is interested in his filming, and she sees his films are rather disturbing. He likes her, so he targets other girsl for his "filming". The police are trying to find out who the killer is, but Mark doesn't let his guard down. The apotheosis is with Mark, the girl and her mother, really gripping. Highly recommended, but take your time for it. Also, no gore, so don't count on any.

Make Satan Cum - totally useless short. A woman grabs a dildo and goes playing with herself. Some short flashes of a guy with a devil's mask jerking off. That's it.

Midnight - the 1982 movie by John A. Russo. It starts out with a girl being caught in a beartrap and then beng clubbed by a family. Then they proceed to let her be sacrificed in the name of Satan. After that, we see Lawrence Tierney as a stepfather going overboard with his stepdaughter, so she runs away from home, but on the road she encounters the satanists. First you will be annoyed by the badness of the actors (or maybe you will enjoy it ), and the lack of action, but while the movie is developing, more and more stuff starts happening. In the last 30 minutes there is enough to go by when it comes to gore, although when I read that it was made by Tom Savini I expected a little more of it (amount). I had fun, but there are better films out there, bith SBiG and normal.

Shark Night 3D - my first movie where I got 3D glasses in the sleeve, so I tried it out. I can see what it means to achieve, but it fails. Whil;e you gain some depth in the picture,. you loos a lot of colourdepth: the image became almost sepia. I wasn't prepared to sit through 90 minutes of sepia, so I ditched the glasses and continued the film in 2D. The film itself isn't much to write about. There is an ultra thin storyline about badly cgi'd sharks in a lake, who encoutner some of the dumbest youngsters in the world. Guess what happens, you will be right. Brainless pulp.

The House of the Devil - wow, nice surprise! Jocelin Donahue plays Sam, a student in dire need of money, so she takes a babysitting job. She finds out there isn't an actual baby in the house where she is hired, but something else is. By then, the slowly developing movie has turned into something grim and creepy because of a sudden death. Creepy stuff ensues, and she grabs a knife to protect herself. She walks through the huge house, running away from something, or persons, chasing behind her. Adding to the atmosphere is a lunar eclipse which darkens the world outside. Talking of atmosphere: it is great! It revives the 80s atmosphere in so many things, nicely done! The plot is cool, there is some gore in the final scenes and the ending is great. Highly recommended!

Rotten Romance - short with 3 even shorter stories of love, one with necrophilia, one with cannibalism and one with transsexualism. It isn't good. I felt empty after watching it. This guy, who also made Make Satan Cum, can better stop making films, because he is very bad at it. Even for filling 20 minutes this is cfrap. You can better refill your fridge, at least that is something useful. Avoid.

Alien Raiders - this film starts out like a standard supermarket stickup, but the criminals turn out to be some sort of secret commandos who hunt extraterrestrial lifeforms. In this supermarket an alien has invaded a body. But... which person(s) are hosting the alien? The commandos are trying to find out, but they encounter several problems, one of which is the local police, who still think it is a standard stickup. Spicy detail is that the negotiator of the police has a stepdaughter among the people who are still in the supermarket. I really enjoyed this film, although we could have seen a bit more of the alien at certain times and the plottwist was kind of cliche, and also a bit farfetched. But the atmosphere is cool, the action is fast paced and although there is only one location in the entire movie, it never gets dull. Recommended.

Freaks (1932): The most old movies that I've seen so far lack a reasonable editing. The transitions between the scenes seem too abrupt or incorrect. This is the first classic movie that got that one right. It is about a kind of travelling circus that has a lot of disfigured persons in it. There is a guy without his lower part. A worm man without arms and legs. Several girls with very small heads. A very thin man and Siamese twins too. No special effects. These are all real freaks in there. Well the story... A woman marries the leader of the circus for his money and gets a revenge treatment. There is no real horror in the movie. But I can imagine that some people might feel disgusted by the freaks, just as a lot of viewers did when this was first released. But as one of the freaks said years after doing the movie: "If I want to see real freaks, I just have to look out of the window.".

Hell Driver - Japanese splatter, from the maker of Tokyo Gore Police. Japan is divided by a wall into two parts: a part where humans can live and a part where undead zombies can have their way. The zombiequeen needs to be destroyed and so her daughter Kika, who got caught by the military dictator (nice Hitler lookalike) takes up the assignment, because she is still pissed off by the fact that her mother burnt her father to death and then stole her heart: as in literally, she ripped it out. Kika then got restored with lots of mechanical parts and now she wields an electric katana, great for fighting zombies of course. The zombies are somewhat different, they have an antlerlike horn on their foreheads and when you take it off, the zombie dies. This film is once again full of hilarious and way over the top stuff. I laughed often, for example at the fight of the chainsaws, where three chopped off zombiearms with chainsaws in them are having a fight with Kika and some others. The ugly cgi is a minus, as is the music (which is way too loud and sometimes very unfitting), but all else is yet another wild ride through Japanses splatter paradise. Recommended for the fans.

The Collapsed - postnuke or something. At least the world isn't what it used to be and a family tries to survive. They end up in the woods. Then the surviving starts. I can tell you, surviving is boring. They walk and walk through the forest, sometimes there is a glimpse of action and then it's back to walking and walking some more. There is a plottwist, but that comes right out of the sky. It is so sudden, that it doesn't fit really. The problem is that the 60-70 minutes before this twist comes around have made the film so dead, that it can't be revived, not even by this plottwist, which isn't so bad actually. This film is Canadian, I noticed because of the rifle being a Lee Enfield No. 4 , but apparently they make bad films in Canada too. Bad acting all around. Skip this.

Area 407 - aka Tape 407. Found footage film. I dislike this genre, and sometimes I give a film a chance to see if I'm right about that or not. I regret it, again. What a load of crap: a plane crashes and the survivors end up in the desert, hunted down by dinosaurs (the film tries to hide this fact by not showing too much, but it is way too obvious to not see it). They think they're saved when a car approaches, but the driver is only shouting at them a little and then drives away very fast. The party of survivors is getting smaller and smaller, but still they keep making stupid decisions, and moreover, and this is my main gripe against the found footage genre: they keep filming it all! Even getting the camera when they "forget" it once is more important than taking a hike to get shelter from the dinos. Come on, nobody buys that! I read in a review that in the end you see what it is about and thus how badly made this is. I agree 100%.

Hundra - yay, 80s fantasy from Spain! Filmed in Andalusia, with a majority of Spanish actors with heavy accents, this film is about a women's tribe being wiped out and then the only survivor, Hundra, goes on a journey to get a baby. Of course, the manliest men are those who wiped out her tribe, so she goes to find them. She ends up in a city where the women are submissive to the men and to a bull which is worshiped as a god. She teaches the haremkeeper that women can be independent too, and they plan to liberate the women of the town. In the meantime Hundra has found the man who she wants to inseminate her, but he isn't very enthusiastic in the beginning. Hilarious scene: "A man cannot be forced to make love to a woman. I have to be aroused first" (think heavy Spanish accent). Well, all seems to go well and in the end we can see Hundra and her baby. Very enjoyable when you want to have a good laugh.

Remains - aka Steve Niles' Remains. Nice zombiefilm. Two members of a casino's personnel are having sex in the basement while outside some sort of a nuke turns everyone into zombies. When the two get out of the basement, they find out, and they also meet some other survivors. Pretty well done, it was an interesting story with some good zombiejokes. My major drawback was the sometimnes very cheap looking cgi, for example the carcrash. It isn't so very hard to make a carcrash without cgi, so why use it? It looked very odd in comparsion to the rest of the film, in which the effects were quite good. Nice ending too. Slightly above average, but since there are so many superbad zombieflicks made, this one stands out. Recommended.

Grizzly Flats - aka Shadow People. Uuggh this one was tough to sit through. Low budget (I mean, it was easy to see the "chopped off" leg was actually dug in) is OK, but then try to make something out of it. The story doesn't help much either: there is a bunch of hillbillies, and a hermit scientist and his wife. They are bothered by almost invisible people who go into their houses and harass them. The wife goes a bit coocoo because she wants a child so badly and thus she is gonna care for a baby-shaped gourd. If you're still with me now, you might find it interesting that the scientist is having a little lab in a shed in the middle of friggin' nowhere to build a perpetuum mobile machine (for those who don't know: that is a useless machine, it is just a technical feat to build one). OK, then we have a sheriff who makes pron in his sparetime and oh, we almost forgot about the shadow people. Uninteresting and badly acted, this one goes in the bin.

ATM - I wanted a serial killer flick, so I watched this one. It actually isn't so much horror, more a thriller. Three people get into an ATM cabin and outside a guy awaits them. While they are still inside, he kills a man who is walking his dog. What follows, is a huge pile of plotholes and illogical stuff, but since the atmosphere was quite nice, I kept watching. Apart f5om the atmopshere there is a whole lot about thos movie going wrong. I'll give an example. At one point, the woman in the group of three (the other two are men, a blonde and a dark haired one) asks one of the men: "how could you get inside when your ATM card isn't working? How did you get past the security thingie?" Then his friend says "You only made me draw money not to look bad, right? RIGHT?!?" Then the guy simpy, says "No" and that's it. So, this guy actually says there is something fishy about him, and then everyone just carries on with what they were doing? While they are in a life threatening position? This is just one of the many, many plotholes. Maybe you can make a game out of it with friends, whoever spots the most irregularities in this one. Nice concept, though, but it doesn't really deliver.

Absentia - Callie is back from rehab and moves in with her sister, whose husband has been missing for years. Since she has started to have him declared death by absentia, she sees appearances who look like her husband. These ghostly appearances haunt her wherever she goes. Callie on the other hand, meets a mysterious man in a tunnel close to their house, and she trades stuff with him but she doesn't know the consequences. Throw in the police, of which one cop is trying to dat Callie's sister and we have th story. It is quite interesting, it is mysterious and the atmosphere can be creepy at times. I almost never knew what was gonna happen next, so I was surprised several times during this film. Good job, filmcrew! There isn't any gore, but the suspense should keep you in your seat. I read that this was low budget, but it doesn't show (much). Recommended, if not highly.

The Devil's Rock - also low budget apparently, and again, it doesn't show so much. Effects are great and apart from the cgi bunker and one cgi shot near the end, I had great fun watching them! The story is idiotic: the nazis have a secret SS department for occult stuff, and on one of the Channel Islands there is a post where they experiment with a demon as a weapon. Two commandos are gonna raid the island, but they of course don't expect what they see there. The last remaining nazi tells about the occultism, now he wants to help control the demon. A black magic fight occurs, how will it end up? Good fun, nice gore, OK film. Recommended.

The Cabin in the Woods http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1259521/
Utter crap. The only redemption is that Amy Acker is in it.

Zonbi asu http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2061869/
Aka Zombie Ass: Toilet of the Dead
Torrent: http://kat.ph/zombie-ass-toilet-of-the- ... 52114.html
Found it quite entertaining though disturbing. Didnt find any subtitles though and my understanding of japanese is zero.
Subtitles isn't needed, the story is obvious enough

Le Monache di Sant'Arcangelo - somewhat atypical nunsploitation. The story is more important than the assets of the genre which made it infamous. There is only one time mild torture and the sexscenes are limited. The story is interesting, however, and it shows the relationship between a convent and the local nobility in the 16th centiry nicely. There is also a clerical process in which some of the nuns are judged, which is interesting. Nothing really shocking, though, so if you look for sleaze or torture, go for a different film.

The Darkest Hour - mmm, some sort of electrical aliens come to earth in the week in which a few Americans are having a holiday in Moscow. The aliens move through electrical equipment, and that is a pretty neat idea and it also doesn't look so bad in cgi. They absorb entire buildings if they want, and people who are attacked simpy disintegrate. Although this could become a nice film, it simply doesn't grab you. Maybe it is the fact that all other cgi looks fake. Maybe it is the fact that is yet again a whole lot of "America, fuck yeah!". But this film didn't do it for me. Brainless timefiller, yes. Good film, no.