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PostPosted: Sun Mar 22, 2020 8:02 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Sacred Flesh - a modern attempt at creating a nunsploitation. It's actually some kind of an anthology, where the wraparound story is about the mother superior of a convent who has visions of Mary Magdalen, in which she is tempted to give in to her carnal desires. To show her why that's not wrong, Mary Magdalen shows her some confessions of other nuns in the convent, and each and every confession is a sex act: one nun masturbates, two other nuns have lesbian sex, a third nun is being abused by a bishop and a priest and the last four nuns have a little orgy. The sexscenes itself are rather standard and come off as some sort of cosplay/roleplay. The wraparound story is not very convincing and at times rather boring. There is some flogging and a sidestory about the servant of a high cleric who is chasing the maid of the convent. Overall a nice effort to revive the genre, but I don't think it will really take off. And even though this was OK, it can't reach the 70s/80s nunsploitations in it's shock value. Recommended for genrefans.

Vampires - this rather unoriginal and dull title hides the fact that this is quite an original take on the vampirefilm. It's a mockumentary in which a bunch of filmcrews try to document the lives of vampires in Belgium (the film itself is Belgian too). Spoken language is Belgian French mixed with some Flemish here and there. The vampires have quite an open way of living and everyone knows about their existence. They have a person who provides food for them in the "fridge", a locked room from which the human can't escape. They also have a human bin on the roof, a cage where future victims are held. They are bound to live by the code, a vampire lawbook, and that provides both opportunities and dangers for the family in question. Interesting and sometimes quite funny, this mockumentary takes you into the darkness of Belgian nights to uncover the lives of vampires. Recommended.

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PostPosted: Mon Mar 23, 2020 11:12 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Sole Survivor - on the cover it says "Before Final Destination, there was..." and I can see why they did that. Not only is the premise of a person who escaped death and is now haunted by the grim reaper present in both films, but also this film needs all advertising it can get, because in itself this one is not very interesting. Denise survives a planecrash, and after being treated in the hospital she is about to resume her normal life. However, she starts seeing strange tings, like a small girl in the loading dock of the hospital. The doctor who did surgery on her tries to help her with the "survivor syndrome" but they also develop a love interest. Things start to become complicated when she gets haunted by strange people in the park, on the streets and at her home. Together with the doctor she tries to find a solution, but it seems she can't outrun death for long, or can she? The backside mentioned 98 minutes runtime, but my version clocked in at 84 minutes. That's enough, because it takes pretty long for things to start happening,. Atmosphere is quite good though, and the last part of the movie is entertaining. I liked the ending, well done. If it wasn't for the Final Destination link, I think this movie would be forgotten entirely. Only go in if you are a real 80s buff.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 24, 2020 2:13 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Young Playthings - a Joe Sarno eurotrash softporn flick. Never heard of Sarno before, I got the opportunity to buy a bunch of his films, but because I didn't know him, I started out with one, which was Young Playthings. This film, restored from a recovered positive (except for one reel which is taken from a VHS, the drop in quality is superobvious), is filmed in Sweden with Swedish actors and actresses speaking English. Some of them have heavy accents, which makes the film even cornier: the core of the film to show as much skin as possible. It starts out pretty normal, but then it turns via plans for a threesome into some really weird shit. The downstairs neighbour is a woman who restores antque toys. She is also making up her face with white paint and lipstick/eyeliner. In this shape she acts out storues which are recorded on tape. These stories are involving ever more people and some realy strange sexscenes are carried out. She even has some sexmachines that take part in these theatrical shows in her living room. There is some plot development going on in the background, but it is mostly just showing off these weird acts, so if you wanna see something strange involving sex, then go for this one. It is a curiosity to say the least.

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PostPosted: Sat Mar 28, 2020 7:48 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Ghostkeeper - three students are touring in the wild, snowy mountains. They get stranded at a remote lodge, because one of their snowmobiles is broken down. They spend the night in the presumably deserted lodge, but they soon find out they are not alone. Very cliche storyline, pretty dull execution: very little scares, next to no gore and a pretty poredictable plot development.They try to drag in the wendigo, but it all doesn't really make much sense. The ending was quite nice, but overall this sin't really worth your time. Not many laughs for bad moviefans either, I'd say pick something different.

Siv, Anne & Sven - the bonus Joe Sarno film. This one has the thock Swedish accents too, and again loads of skin. Not much weirdness in this one, but there are some pretty funny lines, like: "I can't stand people who don't drink" and "I hardly recognize you with your clothes on". The plot, or what's supposed to look like a plot, evolves around a photographer who experiences her wildest dreams in lesbian sexuality and her shy assistant who wants to stay pure amidst all her sex craving friends and colleagues. Of course the paths of these two will cross and then the sparks fly off. Nothing very special.

Acid Bath - on the backcover it says "Street Trash meets Death Wish" and that's some wishful thinking right there. This low budget horror flick never comes close to any of these two. There are some hookers and some drug dealers and there is a guy in a balaclava meatchoppering everyone. A large part of the film is in Spanish, fortunately I speak Spanish, otherwise I'd have felt betrayed a little. The gore is good, but that's the only nthing you should watch this thing for. Apart from the gore, the front cover is the best part of this film. So if you go in with low expectations, you might enjoy this.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2020 10:54 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Linkeroever - aka Left Bank. Belgian horror which I had seen for sale for a long time, but the price was always quite steep. Had the chance to buy it for a good price recently, so I bought it. What a surprise! I am really impressed by this film, and I wonder why this isn't a more famous film, especially in the Low Countries. The story is about a runner called Marie, she qualifies for a championship but then collapses because of health problems. She meets an attractive guy whom she falls in love with and he takes her to his apartment on Linkeroever, the Left Bank of the river Scheldt. The apartments there are pretty exclusive, so she is enchanted to get the chance to live there with him. Pretty soon she finds out that the previous tenant disappeared, she starts to investigate and gets some help from strange people. But are those people strange, or is her new boyfriend the one who is strange? Or is she the one becoming strange because of the circumstances? The film is a bit slow, but that adds tot eh atmosphere which is already great. Acting is also pretty good, maybe Marie's mother was overdoing it a bit, but most castmembers were doing a very convincing job. The flashes you get to see are a tad scary, not because of the image itself being bloody or dangerous or anything, but because of it's role in the story: it makes you uneasy. This fiulm succeeds in making you feel uneasy all over, and the ending is just nice. It had a fery Lovecraftian feel over it, I was totally satisfied. Again, why is this film not more famous? Everybody should see it, highly recommended!

Fresh Meat - in New Zealand, a bunch of criminals help their buddy escape justice and while on the run they seek refuge in an average suburb house. The family in the house is not very average though: they eat human meat because of some new religion the father got into. Not all family members are equally enthusiastic about this new way of eating, and not all criminals are equally interested in keeping the family alive as hostages. This makes for some interesting internal struggles both in the family and among the criminals. They have their fair share of conflicts between the two groups too. Things get awkward soon, and the police visiting the house in search for the criminals doesn't help much. Horror and comedy, this film is funny at times but some jokes fall flat and others are a bit hard to understand (New Zealand accent mixed with Maori language without subtitles is quite the challenge). The gore is plenty and there are some very uneasy moments, overall this was an OK watch but I'm not sure if I will ever watch this again.

The Unnamable - based on a Lovecraft story, so that is already a plus in my book. The setting is very simple, but this film succeeds in being interesting anyway. After the opening scene in which we see an old man getting killed by a creature (this happens somewhere in the past), we move to the present day which is actually in the 80s with the unavoidable bad clothing- and hairdressingstyle from those days. Two students, Howard and Carter (fun reference to the guy who found Tutanchamon's tomb), visit the old house where the old man got strangled: it's still surrounded with legend, and when one of their friends spends the night there and doesn't return, they are going to investigate. A bunch of other students also visit the house and they also get to meet the creature, of which you get to see a little more everytime it appears. You don't really get an explanation as to why this creature is there but atmosphere is nice and acting is OK. I had some good fun watching this and the ending is classic. If you like 80s horror you will enjoy yourself for sure! Recommended.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 05, 2020 12:50 am  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Abraxas, guardian of the universe - low budget scifi where everything takes place on earth or in a darkened room of which there is no way to tell on which spaceship or planet that is. Abraxas is a "finder", some sort of a policeman and his job now is to hunt down Secundus, his fformer colleague gone rogue. Secundus got to earth before Abraxas and impregnated a woman: her child has some special powers Secundus will come to collect later. While he is on this mission, Abraxas is hot onh is heels to apprehend him. The actors who play them are both heavy weight wrestlers or something, the muscle clearly outweighs the brain, even though they try and make the best of it. I actually laughed at some of the jokes Secundus had written into his part. I was surprised to see James Belushi in this flick, I know he wasn't always on top of fame, but this is bad, even for him. The film is clearly taken off some worn off VHS tape, the image quality is quite bad. The sound is the worst though: it's so muffled that sometimes you just don't hear parts of dialogue. This doesn't prevent you from noticing there is a while lot of cheesy stuff going on with the impregnated woman and Abraxas and the comical note added to the movie in the shape of a local policeman is rather dull. I guess this one is only for bad moviefans.

The Unnamable II: the statement of Randolph Carter - very nice sequel, up to par with part one maybe even better. The cast is very similar, Howard and Carter still there, played by Mark Kinsey Stephenson (who only played in a handful more films after this one, which was his third) and by Charles Klausmeyer (who after this film only appeared in shorts and as a voice actor in games). It comes off like this sequel was filmed back to back with the original, but it isn't, you can see that by Klausmeyer's hair which is a tad longer overall. In this one, Carter and a professor (played by John Rhys-Davie) try to break the spell of the Unammable and they free a girl, the daughter of the guy from the past who appeared as a ghost in part one. This girl is played by Maria Ford, who later became a plastic surgery disaster, look her up if you need your boner to go away. Julie Strain is inthe credits but unfortunately she plays the creature, so yes she is in the nude but not the way you would like to remember. Nice sequel, this is the way they should be made in my opinion. Recommended.

WNUF Halloween Special - after  having started watching this for a bit I found out I was watching with the audio commentary by the director: the DVD I got is Swedish and I couldn't figure out the menu, lol. So I quickly pressed Stop when he said something about a spoiler coming up and pressed enough buttons to make sure I was on the right audiotrack this time. This film is a curiosity, as it is made by a guy who wanted to write a loveletter to 80s videostores, 80s horrormovies and 80s local TV stations and their shows (here the audio commentary came in handy). So he remade such a show, a Halloween special, and it looks like it's an old VHS, it has badly dressed horror characters and some storey about a haunted house, and it has commercials every 2-3 minutes. The commercials are all fake, I guess and in that way it is very well done. You even get annoyed a bit by the gazillionth commercial break. I liked this film, even though the story itself was flatter than the earth according to the conspiracists. Go see it if you want to experience an ode to the 80s.

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 06, 2020 11:59 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Return To Nuke 'Em High volume 1 - a rather late Troma remake the classic Class of Nuke 'Em High from 1986. It has a similar storyline, the plant has been rebuilt etc and now a couple of girls whio find out they are lesbian have to save the day. Some nice cameos, fe by Lemmy as the president and lots of green goo. Overacting all the way, some unfunny part by Lloyd Kaufman and the lesbians looking real good make you not really mind that this is in fact an incomplete movie. Why they shot this half only instead of just shortening the whole thing is a mystery to me, I read that Quention Tarantino came up with the idea, well, we all have seen that it didn't do Kill Bill any good so never listen to him again when it comes to ideas like this is my humble suggestion to any director. I don't really need to see the second part but it would have been cooler with ending, of course. If you like Troma, then this is good enough, so just go for it if you get the chance.

Petey Wheatstraw - a film from the Dolemite collection, starring Rudy Ray Moore as Petey Wheatstraw, a guy who was born being a ten-year-old and kicking ass since then. He is being taught in the oriental school of fighting, but he chooses the path of the comedian. When he gets murdered one day by his competitors, he makes a deal with Lucifer and comes back to life, hunting down his killers. Annoyingly, this guy only speaks in rhyme when he is meeting any opponents, which comes off very cheesy. Effects are ridiculous and there is some serious overacting, maybe meant as comedy, who knows. In many cases I didn't know whether to laugh or to cringe, but I know one thing: the scene where Petey gets murdered together with his entire family on the burial of a little boy is extremely cruel: I have never seen a murderscene like that before, mass murder to the max. If you like blaxploitation, or mixed movies with both comedy, kung fu and machineguns, then this is for you. Bad moviefans really should try and search for this one. Highly recommended for them.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 8:50 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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The Keep - in 1941 in a Romanian mountain village, a Wehrmacht troop arrives. They get several warnings by the local caretaker that the keep they are occupying is "special" and there are some rules to follow. Of course they don't and the first night a bunch of soldiers lose their lives. In retaliation, an SS unit executes three villagers the next morning. The Wehrmach officer opposes this, and the SS man and him keep bickering throughout the story. The keep is housing a supernatural entity, and ironically they need a Jewish scholar to help them find the entity and solve the problem of it killing the Germans. When the scholar meets the entity, he gets a promise of a nazi wipe if he wil take a certain amulet outside, but some guardsman has also appeared on the scene, and he is trying everything he can to prevent that. Why? Watch The Keep and find out! Nice adventurefilm with supernatiral stuff in it. There is some gore, but this is not your typical everyday horror. There are nazis, but it isn't a warmovie. But yes, it is very entertaining, the effects are very 80s, but I had a good time. The cast is prett impressive too: Iam McKellen, Scott Glenn, Jurgen Prochnow and Gabriel Byrne all appear in this nice film. The storyline is not very surprising, but acting is good and I'd recommended this to everyone.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2020 12:43 am  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Allrighty, back to horror, scifi and bad movies a fter a long break of warmovies, documentaries and "normal" movies. Watched a lot of historical movies and Kurosawa, great stuff.

Ballad in Blood - wanted to start slowly, so I picked this one which seemed to be a bit like a thriller. It's directed by Ruggero Deodato so that rose my expectations a bit. It shouldn't have because this movie falls flat on it's face, there is a large part of the film where nothing is happening really and Deodato surely must have lost it, like so many of his colleagues before him (looking at you Dario Argento). After a party one friend out of a group of four turns up dead and nobody remembers what happened as they were all drunk and/or high. They have to get rid of the body because they don't know what to tell the police, but they also want to find out what happened to their dead friend. This search for the truth is uninteresting, there is no tension, there are no hints, it's bland as f*ck. Acting is mediocre at best, the actors clearly aren't English native speakers, well, most of them. Save yourself 90 minutes and skip this movie. Shove an oldie of Deodato in instead.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2020 3:32 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Stalled - a zombie comedy, in the tradition of "Shaun of the Dead" as promised by the cover. Well, it's certainly not Shaun of the Dead, or it must be that the main character is mostly in one place all the time. In this film the place is a toilet, he is a maintenance guy and he gets trapped inside a toilet while a christmas party turns into a zombie outbreak. He does several really dumb things and after a while he finds out that a few booths away a girl is trapped inside a toilet too. They have a lengthy conversation (which is pretty boring to be honest) and in the meantime they try to think of a way to escape. The maintenance guy succeeds in borking these ways time and again, though and I guess that's what's supposed to be the comedy. The message of the film is actually pretty good, and the ending was also nice, it's just that it's pretty boring to look at and the jokes are most of the time not very funny. So if you want a real good zombie comedy better watch something else.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2020 12:02 am  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Death Nurse - very low budget shot on VHS slasher about a private clinic murdering their patients, except for one woman who is an alcoholic: she fucks the doctor sometimes in exchange for booze. The nurse is a large fat person who suffocates patients, there is a flashback in which she chopped some people to death with a meat cleaver, you get to see this flashback several times. Film runs only for 58 minutes but it feels longer. All people in this film are either ugly or old (or both), and that is a nice change of pace but I'd rather look at beautiful girls instead, I must admit that. Actually there is no story and it's just a string of murders. A curiosity, but nothing memorable. Bad moviefans might have some fun with it, but the effects are hardly there. Maybe use it as a filler or as a last film of a movienight because it's shortness.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 23, 2020 4:32 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Return To Return To Nuke 'Em High aka volume 2 - managed to get hold of this one too, and I must say it is nicer to see the mivie with the ending after all. There is a short recap of part one and then the goo and gore continues, with Lauren giving birth to a ducklike alien, squirting green and red goo all over the dressing room of the school. The cretins recruit Zack who wants revenge on Chrissy and Lauren, the parts with Lloyd Kaufman are more bearable in this one because he is criticising a lot (society and politics in the US, his own filmmaking, etc.) and in the last part Chrissy looks best. The fights with the foodplantmonster and Kevin the half human duck are nicely over the top. I think I enjoyed this one better, but I still would have preferred them making it one movie instead of these two parts. Recommended for bad moviefans and Troma fans alike.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 26, 2020 2:49 am  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Venus in Furs - aka Le Malizie di Venere. One of the earlier films of Massimo Dallamano, of whom I had seen the giallos (Solange, What Have They Done To Your Daughters, etc.) before. This film is not a giallo, it has some sexploitation, but apart from that it's not really fitting a typical genre. It's a (not "the" as the backcover of the DVD promises) adaptation of the Werner Masoch book about his subordination to a woman who he has been spying on through a peephole in the wall in the hotel where they are staying. When they get into a relationship, he sees his dreams come true, but it doesn't take long for tensions to grow between him and his new wife. For those who have heard of masochism: this is not so much about physical pain but more about mental suffering. There is cuckolding involved and also some whipping, but this never turns into an S&M film really. Acting is OKish, the dub is well, typical. For Italofans only I guess.

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 02, 2020 4:58 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Kuso - ok, no idea what I have been watching, but it was gross. It's some sort of a weird anthology, with pieces of the separate stories appearing in different parts of the film. Maybe there was some logic to it, because the first story also appears again at the end, so maybe they made it centrifugal. There is a story about a couple which practices stranglesex, there is a story about a guy getting cured from titfear by a rectal insect, there is a story about a blind girl with two furry aliens as housemates who gets pregnant and more of this strange stuff. Lots of characters in this film have bodily extensions, like bumps and warts dripping with strange fluids and slime: I guess the filmmakers are Cronenberg fans. The stories themselves don't really lead anywhere, at least I didn't get the feeling that I was following a plot or anything, but they serve to show as much goo, gore and grossness as possible and they succeed pretty handily. Don't eat while you're watching this unless you have a steady stomach. Recommended for bad moviefans!

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 02, 2020 10:50 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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getting cured from titfear by a rectal insect


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 05, 2020 1:52 am  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Yes, you haven't seen anything like this before, that's for sure :lol:

Bloody Chainsaw Girl - aka Chimamire sukeban chênsô. A girl named Giko goes to school with a chainsaw in her bag, and she is gonna need it because one of her classmates has been experimenting with cybertechnology and she has turned several students into cyborgs (not zombies as it says in the description on imdb). These cyborgs all want to fight Giko and she wants to stop all this nonsense by dealing with Ms Nero, the girl who started all the cyborg shenanigans. You get to see a girl with iron teeth (much like Surgeon General from Skinned Deep), a boy with, well, nothing very interesting, a girl with a grenadelauncher in her arms, a girl whose head walks in metal arachnid legs, etc. In het fight Giko must deal with ninjas too but she gets help from a nerdy tech girl who makes her chainsaw shoot bullets and double it's lenght in certain settings. In the final showdown Giko fights Nero who is wielding a chanisaw made out of dead people who can still talk. Lots of cgi blood like you know from so many other J-sploitation splatter films. It's an OK watch, especially because it's not very long. Other than that you rather put Machine Girl on, or Meatball Machine. This one is a tad too plane.

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 18, 2020 10:51 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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The Vineyard - James Hong must have thought that he got too little of T&A so he casted himself as the main character in this film where he gets to feel up many a young blonde tied up in a cellar. The story is a mixture of some supposedly ancient Chinese legend about an amulet giving you eternal life and zombie/body-horror. Hong plays Dr Elson Po, who makes wine on a secluded island. In this wine he mixes powder of the amulet and blood of young people in order to prolong his own life. After a wine auction, a group of young admirers is being transported to the island with the excuse of Dr Po doing a movie audition. In fact he is after their blood for the perfect mix of the wine, and he has some brainless muscly minions to secure the process. Not easy, because one of the admirers is a nosey journalist, and his previous victims tend to rise up at night from the vineyard as zombies. The world wouldn't miss out much on the resty of the visitors, the main victim falls prey to Po supersmoothly and the others are also really gullible. Apart from his quest Po also has to deal with another secret hidden in his mansion... I had fun, it's a nice flick and the atmosphere is juuust right (pretty corny). Acting is OKish, the effects are pretty laughable, with laserbeaming eyes etc. Bad moviefans will love this one, even though it is not that badly made.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 08, 2020 9:49 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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The Snuff Tape Anthology - this ominous name suggests this is not for the fainthearted, and the menu is made up pretty smart: each short is in the shape of a VHS cassette, which you then "take off the shelf" when you select it. Really cool, but very annoying that you have to go naclk to this menu after weach short, and you can't choose to watch them all in one go. So, I ploughed through the menu, what was it, about 9? times, because that's how many shorts there are. And that's where the disappointment kicks in: these shorts are not scary, they are not gross, they are not shocking, they are pretty pathetic. What you get to see is a masked guy and sometimes a girl doing stuff to "corpses", which are badly made models out of plaster and clay. Sometimes there is some "intro text", stating stuff like "I hate life so much in this video I'm gonna kill myself and before I do I comit acts of hate against a corpse". This is rather ridiculous if you ask me, especially when the "act of hate" is pissing on the "corpse". Woohoo, it looks so fake it's not even close to grim stuff like August Underground or even Serbian Movie. The worst part is where the text announces the kidnapping of babies and then killing and eating them and what appears on screen is a stupid doll! I was curious to see what this DVD would hold, but I advise everyone to not buy this one and go for either a better comedy or a more shocking horror.

The Birth of the Living Dead - nice documentary on George Romero's zombiefilms, especially the making of Night of the Living Dead. Some funny stuff included in the interviews and many shots from the film with info what things were based on, which people took which roles and what their other functions (producer, make up artist, etc.) were. Most Romero fans will have seen Document of the Dead, which is also worth watching, but this one is different, so check it out!

Star Odyssey - Italian scifi flick and it shows. Aliens attack earth again, and this time they have an army of androids with them who look like gay models with white whigs and shiny outfits. The eartyh people have a hard time fending off these invader,s because they have spaceships made of Endurium (love the name), a new material which is impenetrabkle for anything known to men. Fortunately, the best galactic warriors team up with two robots and some horny superhero to hold off the aliens until a professor and his female assistant (who is wearing very kinky outfits, even in the lab) discover the anti-endurium formula under the guidance of "the Doctor". But: the evil lordmaster of the dark aliens kidnaps the doctor, so the game is on once more! Acting ranges from pretty good to overacting 101, effects are what you might expect (fun!) and there is also enough *amore* to fulfill the Italo flick ingredients. I was having some good fun even though the runtime is a tad long (over 100 minutes) for this kind of film. Still, recommended for bad moviefans!

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 08, 2020 9:51 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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Found this set of reviews sitting on my harddrive, I actually warched these back in July 8)

Effects - movie about making a movie. I have seen several of these and they are often about low budget horror in the making, as is this one. But this isn't a comedy as so many others, this is a thriller: the concept is that the plot of the film and reality start to get mixed up. The buildup is long, you really get to know the people in the crew. The director shows a film to some of the crew, which is the start of things getting confusing. When the cameraman is taken into the woods, things begin to turn ugly, and some unexpected events make the final part pretty interesting. Not really horror, but it might appeal to horrorfans anyway.

Prisoners of the Lost Universe - wild scifi about three people, a doctor, a mechanic and a TV show host, getting transferred to a parallel universe (a different dimension). This dimension looks conveniently like your average 80s fantasy film. There are warlords, watermonsters, aggressive midgets with red laser eyes, a horse salesman with a talking vulture, etc. When the TV show host gets kidnapped by the warlord, the mechanic goes on a quest to liberate her and trying to find a way back to their own world. Lots of fighting with fists, primitive weapons (like wooden swords and rubber clubs) as well as 15th century pistols. Day turns into night on a whim and the other way around too. Hilarious effects, acting isn't even that bad. On my DVD there was one part in the middle that got scratched, but overall quality was TV level, so not so bad. But it's more cheese than not, so recommended for bad moviefans!

Slime City - Alex, a young student and painter, moves into a new apartment, to persuade his girl Lori to get together. He is sort of enchanted by his neighbour Nicole, who has loud sex every night and seems to hit on him. Invited by his poet neighbour Roman treats him some green yoghurt and liquor, after which he wakes up the next morning covered in slime. Roaming around the streets he murders a homeless man: blood squirts all over the place. This is just the first of many gory killings. How does Alex cope with him changing over? Lots of one time actors in this one (the 2 and 3 timers all acted in films by the same director). The goo reminded me of Street Trash, this film was a lot if fun! Highly recommended for bad moviefans!

I found out that I had seen this last one already, but it was ten years ago and I literally didn't remember one thing about it! Thank you alcohol :drunk: Might be fun to compare the reviews ;)

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2020 1:11 pm  Post subject: Re: The Movies You Watched Today Topic!
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The Curse of la Llorona - ghost films scare me the most, even today still after having watched hundreds and hundreds of horror movies. Most modern day ghost films are going for the jumpscare, and I find those rather annoying. James Wan has succeeded in scaring me several times, with The Conjuring and Insidious. This one is produced by him so that's a good sign. The
storyline evolves around an old Mexican legend about a woman, torn apart by jealousy, drowns her own children. Realising what she has done, she keeps crying over her drowned babies, taking away other people's children to replace them. In the 1970s, a social worker now gets to deal with this spirit, after a case she worked on went totally wrong. There are some jumpscares which didn't appeal to me but also that familiar tingling and scary feeling overall. Sometimes the ghost appears by day which is a mistake: then she's not scary at all for some reason. The nightscenes gave me chills though and acting and everything else is pretty much OK. Recommended.

The Battery - zombiefilm which follows two baseballplayers on the road after a giant zombie outbreak. They gather food, travel around, practise baseball and fight zombies from time to time. Zombies don't play a big role, it's more about how these two guys who are very different, cope with the situation: one is a real adventurer, trying to catch fish for food, bashing zombie's heads in with the baseball bat. The other one longs for a return to normal life, he tries to shut out reality by listening to music on his headphones all the time and shies away from fighting zombies. Character development is well done, but in my opinion the zombies have a tad too small a role throughout. Gore, although scarce, looks good. Original take on zombies yet again, quite the achievement. Recommended for those who are looking for something new.

Battle for the Lost Planet - Corny scifi flick from the 80s in which a thgief tries to escape and the only way possible is by flying a spaceship out of the hangar he is locked in, into space. When he is in orbit, he sees alien spaceships attacking earth, destroying most countries. AFter having orbited for several years he finally lands and experiences the alien's occupation. He is ready to kick them off the planet, so he tries to work towards that goal with the help of some local survivors. This is really a nice one for bad moviefans: the alien ships are obviously miniatures, as are several buildings you get to see being "blown up". The aliens have tapir-like faces and the effects are cheap as f*ck, lots of pew pew. There are also very cheesy jokes, like in the scene where the thief has to hand over the tape which he stole five years ago (and apparently kept on his body all that time) "Give it to me", says the girl "Here? With everyone watching?", he replies. Oof. So if you can stand this, and are into some 80s scifi sfx, then pick this one. There is also a sequel called Mutant War, gona watch that one soonish.

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