monkeysmasher love a.ka. 'it burns when i pee'

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Mon Dec 08, 2003 7:09 pm **Post subject:**

not this time, i have instead decided to grow it long, well long enough for a comb over.

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Mon Dec 08, 2003 11:55 pm **Post subject:**

a god, i am.
I built a man.
And
in My image i'll create
a mockery of manlike shape,
a twisted thing full of hate,
hell and horror incarnate,
now that's a thing i'd like to make.

what to use?
no wax, no wood,
no stone or clay.
I'll make a man from men today.
or pieces,
So
with a needle and thread I stitch the dead
from discarded parts of discarded men.
tools of them to use again.

say,
had
this manmade man made me mad?
as intricatley interlaced arteries
of my thoughts unwind from in my mind,
webs of veins blood flows cold
pulse a river,
parts, muscle pistons with gears of bone
am i mad?
i dont know.
But like god i just made a man
and constantly his scream began
fractured cries, my manmade man,
in my bloodied room, hell began.

ah, ijust made that up. too much freetime. i'll call it 'Happy Slappy 's funtime jamboree and reverse autopsy extravaganza'.

on a side note, this is also why the squirell poplulation decreases wherever i go. big animals are easy to build, it's the little ones that are a bitch and a half, tiny little joints and bones, it almost makes me want to give up on both my squirellman and my monkeyshark projects.

spudthedestroyer · **Posted:** Tue Dec 09, 2003 1:59 am **Post subject:**

you can post some films on the frontpage if you got the time :lol:

Seriously, lets hope santa brings you a gameboy (or playboy if need be)

Death · **Posted:** Tue Dec 09, 2003 2:38 am **Post subject:**

DxaKrator wrote:

Damn,and I clicked in here hoping to see something invovling ass and shaving cream...silly me..although it isn't like I haven't seen you shave your ass before,the fur still plugs the damned bathtub!!! :shock:

You mean this? :mrgreen:

http://www.campchaos.com/cartoons/ass/index.html

paul-scream22 · **Posted:** Tue Dec 09, 2003 11:12 am **Post subject:**

This thread gets the vote for most messed up and confusing for me!!!

Good job monkeysmasher keep up the spamming

LOL

You tried an apache way of life yet monkey?

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Wed Dec 10, 2003 2:52 pm **Post subject:**

no apache, i just lycos'd instead.

i was just trying to see if i have any distinguishable talent at anything even remotely interesting. that was the 3rd poem ive ever written, the first being really more of a limmerick about the time i got this girls to perform the french arts on my willie and got hit in the head with a shovel, the second was about how hot it was outside, and this one about how i built a guy out of homeless people.

or maybe the slight chance an antip2p person copies my poem onto thier computer without my permission and i can subpeona thier shit. so everything copyrighted-able is copyrighted to me, and cannot be reproduced anywhere by anybody at anytime.

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Wed Dec 10, 2003 6:47 pm **Post subject:**

Iconoclast · **Posted:** Wed Dec 10, 2003 7:36 pm **Post subject:**

Nice job monkey... like em.

DxaKrator · **Posted:** Wed Dec 10, 2003 7:41 pm **Post subject:**

Killer pics monkey. :mrgreen:

...Would make a great backdrop for the menu on DvD...Now I know what you do in your spare time :wink:

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Wed Dec 10, 2003 9:38 pm **Post subject:**

all my time is spare time. i am retired, and have been for about 5 years now.
it's play on the internet, draw, tattoo, or sleep.
though i am considering taking up drinking.

karstmobile · **Posted:** Thu Dec 11, 2003 3:56 am **Post subject:**

Retired!

Hey, can I crash at your place for awhile? Like a few years. Need some time away from things to do what I enjoy most... nothing. Jimmy's quiet and usually gets along with others.

And if I bring my comp over we can share files over ed2k even though we are in the same house... WACKY!

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Fri Dec 12, 2003 7:39 pm **Post subject:**

ah, i put me and john doe's 'signs you are in an itallian horror film' on my website as i am uploadiing stuff to it. most of them are funny, i thought, some are more along the lines of 'filler'.

http://members.lycos.co.uk/skitzotheclo ... Horror.htm

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Sat Dec 13, 2003 11:39 pm **Post subject:**

ah, i hope john doe doesnt mind i posted his signs too. i dont think you will would, as yours are the funnier ones.
the girlfriend one still makes me chuckle.
i know my little website kind of sucks, it always does. i have the framework of it, i am just changing all the href's to lycos. i was putting movie reviews up, on movies nobody has ever heard of and not on other sites, hence the 'movies nobdy wanted'.

seriously, has anybody ever seen 'monster of the lost swamp' aka 'swamp of the lost monster'?

http://members.lycos.co.uk/skitzotheclown/

is to get to the main portion, though most the links are not linked, and the menubar are going to be changed.

though the bsplayer skin is linked in 'projects' with a picture of all the button functions, and some pictures are in artwork section.

John_Doe · **Posted:** Sun Dec 14, 2003 7:11 am **Post subject:**

Ok, that's it. I've told the RIAA about this. That shit was copyrighted..

naaah, seriously yours are much better.
I'll try to come up with more:

Moments of your life are cut out
You feel the urge to act and dress like a woman, but you're actually a man. (goes for the whole slasher genre actually)
When you tear paper it sounds like clipping hard cardboard with a scissor.
Your great great great great grandpa wants to have you for dinner.
Goodlooking women you've never met before always show you their breasts with silly exuses like 'This sweater is so tight'
It seams like it's the 70's again.
Your life has a predictable surprise ending.
You hear someone behind you but it was only the cat. You hear someone behind you but it was only the cat. You hear someone behind you but it was only the cat. Ooops you're dead, should've remembered you don't have a cat.
You keep bumping into impaled tribeswomen.
Someone stabs you 40 times, cuts out your heart AND lynches you and you're not too happy about it, but kinda enjoy the groovy background music.
The guy sitting in front of you at the cinema is making too much damn noise whilst he's devouring his girlfriend.
Your lifeline is not in chronological order because of bad editing.

eh, don't know if they are any good... use the ones you like, or none at all.

Finally you updated your page. NICE! keep it up. =)

John_Doe · **Posted:** Sun Dec 14, 2003 7:19 am **Post subject:**

oh yeah, I forgot 1 more:

You keep ending up inside paintings

d0c · **Posted:** Sun Dec 14, 2003 1:55 pm **Post subject:**

oh this is one of them old posts from the ice age, i remember this one when it started in 2001.... maybe its time to let it fade away? :beerchug:

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Sun Dec 14, 2003 9:31 pm **Post subject:**

ah, delete the thread if you want, your the mod. ive deleted this whole thread maybe 3 times, but it pops back up. i hoped it was because member's thought it was funny or entertaining and let me fullfill my one goal in life*: to make milk come out of your nose from laughing, ruining a perfectly good keyboard(except for the people with the spermguard keyboard waterproofing- you know who you are!).

of course my thread is a bit pointless, i dont offer any movies or such, i got nothing against a mod killing the thread. maybe it's taking up space that can be used for another gay amiga post or picture of a sparkler shoved into a guys peehole.

on the otherhand, here is 'cthulusnuggles' i did this morning-
http://members.lycos.co.uk/skitzotheclo ... work-2.htm

* (besides banging 2 chicks at once.)

John_Doe · **Posted:** Mon Dec 15, 2003 4:56 am **Post subject:**

Nonsense! Just like I tell those pro-cencorship doobs I say to you, Doc: If you don't like it, don't watch/read it! BAH!

:lol:

Iconoclast · **Posted:** Mon Dec 15, 2003 3:50 pm **Post subject:**

Yeah, this topic rulez

monkeysmasher · **Posted:** Mon Dec 15, 2003 11:03 pm **Post subject:**

the mob has spoken!

hail ceaser! hail Monkius Ceasar!

monkeysmasher love a.ka. 'it burns when i pee'

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